Posts in: March 2003


As usual, I was talking to Leah the other night, pissing and moaning about how awful my life is. She said to me, “I just don’t get why your life is so bad. You always complain about it, but I don’t see why.” That made me stop in my tracks, because I had absolutely nothing good to say in response. All I kept thinking was, “Holy shit, she’s actually right. I bitch about everything, but nothing’s really wrong.” I told her I bitch because I like it, despite the fact that (usually) nothing is wrong.

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World Domination™

I just finished writing a paper about…well, let me just paste in the title, which pretty much sums it up: “Nationalism, Globalism, and Pontifications on Whether or Not the World Has Changed in Any Way Whatsoever Since the Roman Empire.” I didn’t really find an answer to my rant. I guess it’d be a big fat “no,” but since I was allowed to simply rant about the way I feel about things, I didn’t want to bog it down with details like “supportive evidence” or “facts,” so I remained purposely vague.

Oh well.

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I Am Now a Movie Star…I Guess

I was sitting in my Screenwriting class today, minding my own business, casually checking out this really hot girl who was sitting two seats away from me, when I noticed a guy simply staring at me. When I looked at him, he didn’t stop. He just kept staring. Then, eventually, he stopped, but the damage had been done. I know I’m bizarre-looking, but that’s not license to stare at me, to contemplate a face only a cement mixer could love.

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The Doctor Is [REAL IN]

After roughly five years of stalling, I finally shelled out the money for a new Dr. Grip pencil. On a whim, I also bought the dreaded Dr. Grip roller ball pen.

I admire the new design on the pencil—it’s springier, and it’s easier to load the lead and replace the erasers.

And the pen is, quite simply, the best pen I’ve ever owned.

All in all, a good week for office-supply purchases.

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Deconstructing Harry

I have no social life, so I spend most weekends watching TLC, trying to identify why I have such a terrifying attraction to the overly perky Paige Davis. Unfortunately, now that TLC has developed an army of terrible reality shows, they no longer play Trading Spaces and While You Were Out marathons every single weekend, so when there was nothing else on, I decided to watch Woody Allen’s Deconstructing Harry, which I’d never seen before.

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Five Steps to a Better Blog!

I have a lot of friends with LiveJournals. And they have a lot of friends with LiveJournals. And they have a lot of well-wishers with LiveJournals. The LiveJournal community is fascinating, if not utterly baffling, but it really did make me realize that, as a blogger, I am not maximizing my emo potential. So I’ve constructed a series of rules that will alllow readers to really feel my bland white-boy pain, instead of just reading and laughing uproariously.

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I got my paper back from my Politics class yesterday. I got an A on it somehow. My professor wrote this comment: “Great paper. I like the tone in which it is written and the insights it offers.” I think she might have misread the entire paper.

Still, you gotta love a class where you compare the President of the United States to Hitler, Otto von Bismarck, Osama bin Laden, and Saddam Hussein, with no real research or logic behind the comparisons, and you still get an A.

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Exciting Update on My Movie Stardom

[As we all should currently know, I am right about to become a movie star. I’ve been invited to star in some dude’s student porno, and as such the phone calls have begun. Most of my friends know I’m not a big phone guy, so I don’t get a lot of calls.

Then again, most of my friends wouldn’t call me even if I liked being on the phone.

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